I was asked something like that this week by a girl I’m just getting to know. Her aunt is friends with my Mom back in MN, and when Jessie & her husband moved to the next town over last year and her aunt came to visit, she introduced us.
*insert humming* It’s a small world after all…
At any rate, she has a little boy who is 14 months old, and I stopped over to her house last Wednesday for a couple of hours to hang out and get to know her a little better. Stella had just gotten her HIB and Pc shots, so between the Tylenol and comfort nursing, she was pretty much in and out of naps the whole time, and Jessie’s little boy was nursing and napping as well. For the next couple of hours, the conversation pretty much revolved around our kiddos, parenting philosophies, and the like.
Honestly, I really enjoyed talking with someone who can has similar philosophies as myself who has “been there, done that” with her own child (and recently!). It’s good experience to learn from.
Then, as I was getting ready to go, she asked me that.
No? I hope not? Did I give you that impression?
I really feel like I don’t talk about Stella all that much in real life. Yes, she is the center of my world, but when we’re hanging out with our friends on a Friday night having dinner and drinks, we talk about anything and everything (95% of the time it’s NOT baby related), and I like it like that.
I guess that maybe it was easier(?) to talk about the kiddos during our first real, in depth, extended one-on-one conversation, but I admit, it’s not the best way to get to know more about each other as people, not just Moms. Before I had Stells, I honestly found it kind of boring when people wanted to talk about their kids non-stop. It still drives me bonkers when I’m chatting with a friend on the phone and the conversation is suddenly halted because her 2yo wants to say hi. Um, no, you’re holding the phone by their ear, they are smiling at you, and all I’m hearing is silence or a shy “hi” … and I’m just annoyed that I have to wait for you to get back on the phone.
Is that bad?
My point is that I really hope that I don’t become one of those mothers who is so focused on talking about the kiddo that she forgets how to talk about her own hopes, dreams, goals, and life. I think that will make me a better Mom in the long run.
What do you think? Do you find yourself only talking about your kid? Does it bother you, or do you just feel like you talk about what is the biggest part of your life right now? If you’re still TTC, does it bother you when people can only talk about their kids? Where is the balance?
Check out Jessie’s blog if you get a chance – she’s a great writer, and I think you’ll enjoy her blog. 🙂