TTC#2 Cycle 1 Thoughts

ETA – It feels completely weird to be writing a post like this after our first cycle of TTC#2. I have a few IF friends who got pregnant more easily with #2, and they were right – it totally throws you for a loop. It’s almost like I feel like I’m not allowed to claim my IF background as my reality anymore. I’m not quite sure how I feel about things right now. It’s a mind fuck.

  • CD1 – I’m SO thankful to have gotten my period while still breastfeeding. When Stella was born, I had zero intention of going longer than one year, but now at 15mo pp, I’m glad we have gone as long as we have. Stella seems to be slowly dropping her morning and nighttime feedings on her own anyway, so I hope it’s a really smooth, gentle transition for both of us. I really didn’t want to wean her before we were both ready just to get TTC#2 on the road, because what if it was all for naught anyway? I’m going to miss breastfeeding.
  • CD3 – My friend Mary gave me one of those “fertility tests” to pee on that supposedly check your FSH levels. Mine was all good.
  • CD14 – I didn’t even start OPK testing until today. Historically, if I was going to ovulate in a cycle, it happened between CD19-30. Not expecting that to change now.
  • CD23 – I apparently was still holding out hope that my cycles would have magically become more normal. From CD10-23 I tried to loosely keep us on a BD schedule (without cluing Charlie into the plan). Trying to keep this fun this time around. Scheduling sex sucks. Giving up the every other day thing for awhile.
  • CD31 – Headed to STL on vacation for the next 5 days. No time/place for sex. Probably won’t ovulate anyway since I’m past CD30.
  • CD36 – A positive OPK? Holy shit, I’m actually going to ovulate this cycle?? This morning I came down and told Charlie I was ovulating, and could we pretty please have a quickie before he left for work? Charlie said, “So we’re back to this are we?” We set Stella up on the couch with her sippy cup of milk, a bowl of cheerios, and an episode of Super Why. I even pulled out the big guns (pre-seed) to give us a fighting chance. My EWCM sucks…pretty much non-existant ever since cryo when I was in college. I jumped him again that night. Just gotta make sure you know? 🙂 He wasn’t in the mood at first, but then decided it was a good idea after all. LOL
    • Proceed to test my LH surge 3x that day plus the next morning. All showing a positive surge. Later than I’ve ever ovulated (before if it was past CD30, they just turned into anovulatory cycles).
IMG_0606_edited-1

What it looks like when you have to test from CD14-CD36 to finally see a positive LH surge! Damn PCOS.

  • CD42 – According to FF, I’m 5dpo and I’m frickin’ sick at the same time. It’s making my BBT temps spike weird too. Hoping this doesn’t screw with implantation if that actually is happening.
  • CD46 – Stella’s daycare provider told me today that her mother-in-law (who she always says has a direct line to God) asked her around Easter if I was pregnant or trying to get pregnant again, because she sees me with two little girls. It literally made my heart catch in throat and tears come to my eyes.
  • CD48 (11dpo) I was going to wait 2 more days to test, but couldn’t do it. I took my BBT at 5:45 as usual – still going up – so I crept into the bathroom to pee. I refused to let myself look at the test for the requisite 5 minutes, instead taking the time to lather lotion all over my sunburnt body from working on our new deck yesterday. I just looked at 5:55 (5 is a lucky number in my family), and HFS, I see a faint 2nd line. Could this seriously have worked first cycle?!?!?! Peed on a 2nd cheapie HPT, same result. Laying in bed shaking right now, trying to sleep again. I need to wait a few hours and test again before I tell Charlie. Holy shit.
    • 7am – Charlie gets up to shower, and when he gets out, I’m standing there holding Stella and a pee stick with a faint second line on it. I say, “So this happened this morning.”
    • Commence freak out / shock all day. I drink a couple of beers (hell, most people wouldn’t know they were pregnant yet anyway) and try to make normal conversation with friends. I tell my best friend Mary because I need to tell someone
  • CD49 (12dpo) I’m testing 2x/day, and the line is definitely getting darker. We decide to tell Charlie’s parents, because no matter what happens, we want their support. They are shocked and ecstatic.

IMG_8144

  • CD50 (13dpo) Darker and darker lines. Is this for freaking real?! I got my entire family (the 5 siblings + my parents) on Google Hangout at the same time tonight, so we tell them too. They are also shocked. Also ecstatic. 🙂 After that, we Facetime with Charlie’s brother & SIL in Minnesota to tell them. Same reaction. Shock and tears of joy. This is insane and surreal.

(I love that one sister was in the grocery store in Maryland, one sister was in the car with her boyfriend in Minneapolis, my brother was in his apartment in Fargo, and my other sister [the one we were stalling for because we knew she was almost there] was with my parents. My Mom was taking this video – she had NO idea what we were about to tell them!)

  • CD51 (14dpo) I took belly pics this morning, because though I’m slightly afraid of jinxing something, I’d regret it later if I didn’t take my weekly picture. We told Charlie’s sister over lunch at our place – Stella carried our little scrabble picture over to her perfectly and Jaime burst into tears. 🙂
  • CD52 (15dpo) I got an initial appointment scheduled with an awesome home birth midwife who has practiced in the area for 25+ years. May 14th… so a couple of weeks away. I am SO hoping that Charlie will get on board with this.
IMG_0853

The FRER is from 13dpo. I started testing with internet cheapies on 11dpo (2 on 11dpo, 2 on 12dpo, then 1 a day after that. I need to start testing, b/c it’s starting to freak me out if the line isn’t always darker. Has anyone else had this happen with the cheapie HPTs? I’m tempted to go buy a FRER.

So there is the breakdown of my last couple of months! I started the cycle taking 4g of myo-inositol and a folic acid pill every day. FWIW, I started the myo-inositol with moderate regularity back around the 1st of the year. Around CD30 I gave up the supps while we went on vacation to STL – I was pretty sure I wasn’t going to ovulate anyway. On CD37 I miraculously ovulated, and on CD43 I decided I’d better pick back up with the supplements just in case. At that point I started taking 3g of myo-inositol + a folic acid pill every day. We used pre-seed for sex during O time, and that is it.

Also, Jay just wrote a really interesting post about myo-inositol in response to a question of mine. She included this final paragraph, and it really makes me wonder if this was the key for us:

Also, some information to note, if part of your issue is low progesterone, this may really be something to try out, since both published literature and my experience (with the 1000 g/day dose) suggest that this really can increase progesterone levels.

I have PCOS and borderline short LPs, possibly because of low progesterone. It seems like myo-inositol could have been helping me all around.

Overall though, this seems like it was too easy in comparison to our experience last time, and that definitely scares me a bit. With Stella, it took us nearly two years, $10,000, and a lot of help from doctors to get to this point. It doesn’t seem real that this could happen for us without that same process happening this time around. I’ve bought a $25 pack of internet OPKs/HPTs, bought 2 jars of myoinositol (one in powder form and one in pill form) for $25 total, and my best friend gave me a FRER that she had laying around (I’d given her my leftover FRERs after getting pregnant with Stella two years ago!). That’s it. I’m not trying to brag or sound ungrateful – I’m just in a bit of shock and disbelief that this could happen. For the first time ever, I spent more money on beer than fertility related stuff in a cycle and I’m pregnant!

Also, we’re going “low tech” with this pregnancy so far. No beta (can’t afford them – $100/ea and we’d need two of them – seems crazy to spend that on an elective blood test, even though I really really wanted to do them) and no ultrasounds (earliest they would do for a “regular” pregnancy is 12w, and usually not until 20w – losing my MIND about that). I really do want to try to stay in a positive, “fertile” mindset as much as possible. I’m looking forward to my meeting with the midwife on the 14th, and we’ll see how everything goes after that! Our insurance BLOWS, so that’s another benefit to midwife care and a home birth – it would cost us max $4,000 for all prenatal/delivery/postnatal care  (and I’m hoping I can get my insurance to maybe cover something) instead of $8,000 for a hospital delivery. That’s a big difference.

So that’s the breakdown of my last 53 days. Insane, right?!

BFP#2

49 comments

  1. Insane! And also…THE BEST. I had two pp periods, and figure I must have ovulated on CD 45. WTF? I don’t know what changed. But I DO know that while IF/PCOS are not cured, it’s nice to have a “freebie” after all that shit. I’m glad this happened for you guys – just beyond glad. Like, stupid amounts. 🙂

    1. Definitely worth a freebie! Your body owes you a shout after all the crap you’ve thrown it’s way. Her that body if mine. HEAR THAT!!!!!

  2. Definitely sitting here on the couch boo hooing happy tears for you guys!!! Loooooved the video of your family – so sweet!! Continuing prayers for health and peace!!

  3. kel24 · · Reply

    First congrats Josey! So excited for you!

    I have 2 children after fertility treatments (male factor), then I had 2 early losses and the following month for the SECOND time within 6 months, got pregnant on our own first cycle we “tried” and that little guy just turned one 🙂 I could not believe it and some days I still can’t. That cycle we did use digital ovulation tests (cheaper on eBay and also easier to read) and pre seed.

    We are now trying for another. If it happens great, if not I am fine with it and very happy and content with my children 🙂 This was our first month “trying” and we used digital opk’s again and pre seed. I am down to nursing once a day and my period has been back for about 4 months now, cycles are 28-29 days and ovulation day 14-15.

    So we will see! I just feel like maybe we won’t be that lucky again ya know? But you have given me hope and something to smile about today so thank you 🙂

  4. I think that’s the most frustrating thing about PCOS – that you can ovulate and maybe get knocked up on your own, but then again, sometimes it isn’t that simple either. Yay for this being simple! YAY! Such cute reveals.

  5. A mind fuck is how I would describe it 🙂 it took me a couple of months and an ultrasound to convince me that #2 was on his way! Congratulations!!!

  6. amazing!!!! I love the video, it made me cry, what great reactions and what a cool way to share with your family!!!!!!

    I love the Minnesota accents, makes me think of my step family up there!

    Congrats, I am so happy that this went so smoothly for you, let’s hope this carries into the pregnancy and it is easy the whole way! Maybe get a doppler, I know it won’t help with not getting teh early ultrasounds, but it might be cool for Stells to listen to as well!

  7. Elizabeth · · Reply

    So happy for you! It is so wonderful that everything happend like it did this time. I will pray for you and that little babe. That is really all anyone can do. Whatever is going to happen is going to happen. I think it’s great that you are going low tach this time. I am not sure if I could do it but good for you. Keep us all posted on how everythng goes.

    1. Ha, I’m not really going low tech out of desire, but more out of necessity. It’s driving me nuts already to not know if my betas are doubling appropriately!!

  8. I’m so excited for you guys!

    Scheduling sex DOES suck. I got so bored with it the month we conceived G. I’m hoping to be a little more relaxed about it this time around 🙂

  9. PCOS is a crazy thing…my BFF Rock had something similar happen to her. It’s so unpredictable…I’m beyond thrilled for you! So exciting you’ve told all the family already. Babe still hasn’t told half his family yet. Just his dad. But that’s a whole different story. 🙂

    I can’t believe your insurance doesn’t cover simple things like ultrasounds and betas. That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard! It’s nearly standard to get an ultrasound on your first visit here, the 12w is optional, but because I’m old it’s covered. Then 20w. As for betas, is a qualitative test covered? It doesn’t give numbers, but most doc’s offices require a blood test to confirm a +hpt. It’s so weird how some places do things so very differently.

    Good luck holding it together. With Raegan I had twice as many ultrasounds because of my SCH. I don’t want to go through that again, but damn I miss those weekly ultrasounds. Can’t wait to hear how things go and I hope Charlie gets on board with the home birth plan….You’ve got this one down!

    1. I’m sure my insurance would cover a qualitative beta test, but i feel like that’s pretty unnecessary. I talked to my midwife last night, and she did order me a P4 test to at least check my progesterone levels. Insurance blows.

  10. Damn hormones have my crying at my desk after watching that video. I am just so happy for you guys and glad that TTC #2 was nothing compared to the wait and money you had to go through the first time around (although I know you wouldn’t change any of it b/c it brought you Stella). Love that you tracked all of this and have it to look back on. I totally know what you mean about not knowing where you stand right now after having it “easy” this time around. I think that’s why I’m still in a bit of denial that I’m pregnant and will have another baby in a matter of weeks. Enjoy it! You did it! Yay!!!! XOXO

  11. oh wow! Contratulations!!

  12. Congratulations!! That is fantastic news!! It is a strange place to be when you get pregnant quickly after struggling for so long! I was in this middle land forever with this pregnancy (#3) because it took us so long to get and stay pregnant with Carol.ine and this one was the first cycle. Praying for a nice healthy baby!!

  13. mcmissis · · Reply

    Crazy cycle! My Internet hates me this week so I wasn’t able to watch the video. Probably good though since I cried just READING about Stella’s auntie finding out 🙂 As a fertile, I’ve always had to go low-tech. I just POAS every few days for a while, then slow to once a week for a bit :/

    Please try not to feel like you’re bragging. You’re not! And even if people are envious (myself included!!!), they know you’re documenting this for yourself, Stella, and future baby.

    Again, I am sooooooooooooo effing excited for you I could scream.

    1. mcmissis · · Reply

      Oh yeah! And Stella’s daycare provider story = AMAZING! What a great story that will be to tell Stella’s little sister. Or to tease her little brother with 🙂

  14. So… I cried. The video was just too much!

  15. Okay so I had tears of joy throughout this entire post… and then I watched the freaking video!!!! Ahhh!! When your mum shouts “Josey!!!” with joy.. I just burst into tears!!!! I am so excited for you and so happy that it was so much easier this time around. You deserved this. I know how hard or even impossible it would have been to pay for treatments again. I am so happy for you. I loved reading through this. Crazy PCOS. I am hoping things go as smoothly for me for this first cycle back!! Eek!

  16. Holy Crow! Congrats, mama!!!!

  17. mcmissis · · Reply

    I’m so glad I kept coming back to see if my computer would finally let me watch the video! Soooooo sweet 🙂

    Also, I just remembered you had awful morning sickness last time. Maybe you’ll be graced with that again to give you peace of mind about baby staying put :/

  18. Josey!!!! This is great news. So happy for you. A dream come true.

  19. Whoa, WHOA!!! Just getting caught up and am over the moon for you! Congratulations!!

    Sometimes the first time is the hardest simply because we’re spending so much time trying to find the problem. It sounds like being armed with this knowledge allowed you to hone in on options that you may not have been aware of before, resulting in addressing some previous issues. It’s certainly not jinxing anything that it worked out the first time.

    Wishing you a healthy and uneventful 9 months filled with joy and lots of wonderful memories!

  20. Your family is just adorable. And look at that fertility friend chart! Dang… Bringing back the memoriezzzzz. 😉 I couldn’t be happier for you!!

  21. Holy crap dude my mouth is on the floor!!!!! YOU TRACKED *ALL OF THAT*????

    Honest to goodness I had like no idea how much tracking can go with a history of infertility. Like, I feel dumb.

    Unreal dude. You worked out some magic!!!

    1. LOL, see – I feel like I barely tracked anything this cycle. I took my temperature once a day at 5:45 before I got out of bed, and then I peed on a stick one a day before I did anything else. That’s it! I tracked WAYYYY more while TTC with Stella. I guess maybe that’s the difference between people who have problems getting pregnant in the first place and people who have problems staying pregnant (please oh please *knock on wood* let me not experience that second part). Our set of problems are so different that we forget that the “other side” deals with completely different issues and worries.

  22. Woohoo! How exciting! Love your family’s reaction. 🙂 Must’ve been the STL magic that made this cycle work-congrats!

  23. Oh I forgot to mention how I love that you had a few beers after getting your BFP!!! 🙂 This is why I love you… so something I would do! You are right though.. many many people are still drinking much more than a couple beer by that point, not knowing of the pregnancy for days or even weeks later!

    1. I love that you’d do this too. 🙂 I felt like I should be real and include it, b/c I can’t be the only person who is like this! It’s not like I’m out getting hammered – big difference. 🙂

      1. Ditto! This is great!! We found out about Sofia while spending the weekend in Paris with my best friend and her husband. I know we could have told them, but it felt so fragile. But OF COURSE I couldn’t be in Paris and NOT drink red wine. She turned out just fine! 😉

  24. Love how you did the quickie. Made me smile! Now this direct line to god….lets talk ok!

  25. Loved the video…this is a lot of what I meant in my post about how freaked out I was to get pregnant so easily with #2. It took me almost till the end of the 1st trimester to accept that I really was pregnant. I was so afraid that my body was just screwing with me, and it just didn’t make sense that I could get a healthy pregnancy from sex and not from IVF…it’s a weird thing to go through and it feels like this huge miracle, even though non-infertile people get pregnant every day and probably never even think about it.

  26. P.S. I forgot to say congratulations!

  27. So amazing! Thank you so much for sharing, and wishing you so much goodness in the weeks and months to come!

  28. Holy Crap, Josey! This is so awesome! Getting pregnant on the first try is such an incredible, and inexplicable thing. Especially after having had difficulty in the past. I am so glad that you don’t have to go down this haunting road again for #2. I will be keeping everything crossed that everything proceeds as normal!

  29. Oh my gosh, this is amazing!! I am so so so happy for you lady!!!

  30. I cannot get over this!!! Congrats doesn’t even come close. I cried watching the video. I’m so happy for you and at the same time I’m happy for myself, this gives me SO much hope you have no idea. Crying like a baby!!

    And I’m so excited to hear you’re looking at home birth. Yay yay yay!!!! Xoxo

  31. Woohoo! Congrats!

  32. Oh my goodness!!! I just randomly clicked over to your blog from Sheelah’s and this is the first post I read. Obviously I don’t know you at all and I am sitting here at my kitchen table basically sobbing tears of joy for you and your family. So glad to have found your blog and will definitely keep reading. Congratulations!!!!!

    1. So neat to see bloggy pals finding other bloggy pals in this big bloggy world!! 🙂

  33. Verrry cute video! I hate that you don’t get any reassurance that all is well sooner, but hang in 🙂

  34. You knew you were pregnant and drank some beers???? I am shocked and saddened to read this. You seem to drink a lot lately according to your blog and I had honestly wondered if you had a drinking problem. If you think back to your IF days, you would have scratched someone’s eyes out for admitting they knowingly drank beer while pregnant! Denial is saying something like “Heck most people wouldn’t even know they were pregnant by now.” But you did know! I am just being honest with you as I have read your blog for over 2 years now. I am not sure I will be able to read much more.

    1. Wow, I am sorry but if you look over every other comment on this post full of tears of joy and words of congrats for Josey, it makes me “shocked and saddened” to read your comment. This is her blog and her space to be honest about her life… and that is what I and so many others love about her. In most countries around the world it is completely acceptable to have a couple of beer or glasses of wine on occasion throughout the pregnancy. Josey is talking about doing it on one occasion when she received this shocking news.

      And I can’t even begin to say how utterly disgusted I am about your ‘drinking problem’ comment. I think you need to have a bit more decency and respect for someone who says they have followed Josey for two years.

      1. Hi. Fiona,

        As someone who has followed this blog and same path and journey I am not going to sit and be fake. My response to Joseys pregnancy was excitement and as I read that part my heart sunk. Having traveled the TTC road with her, that comment stung. I am being a honest person by stating what I did and I stand by my statements.

    2. Hi Rod,

      Though you say you have been following me for two years, I have never seen you comment before this week. I do appreciate when people come out of the woodwork to comment, as it’s fun to see who the “lurkers” are.

      That being said, you are way off base here. If you have been following me for two years, you should know that I also drank a light beer here and there throughout my first pregnancy with Stella – WITH the full blessing of my medical provider. I have NEVER wanted to “scratch someone’s eyes out” for drinking beer while pregnant.

      More importantly, I am not an alcoholic (while pregnant or not). I do not drink hard liquor while pregnant, and I would never do something to harm my unborn child. I am a good Mom. When I had a couple of light beers at 3w5d pregnant, that the tiny bundle of cells in me had ZERO blood connection to me yet. There is no placenta that early, and the embryo is still sustaining itself with the help of a yolk sac. Ever if it had been at 15w, I would have been comfortable having a light beer – again – with the full blessing of my medical provider, whose opinion is always the one I’d defer to on this.

      This is something we’ll just have to agree to disagree on. If you can’t do that, then please take your judgments elsewhere.

      Thank you.

      1. Great response. And congrats again! How cool to have those reactions from your fam saved for posterity 🙂

  35. mcmissis · · Reply

    Just came back to stalk your ovulation tests :/ Then I saw the drinking comments. I’m glad you responded with such factual information. I learn something every day!

  36. Ariane · · Reply

    I’ve been reading for a couple years and have never commented before (I don’t think at least.). Anyways, congratulations! The Google Hangout video of your family is so cute and your mom’s heartfelt exclamation “Josey!” is so touching. And I think I have fallen in love with the name Augusta! Seriously.

  37. […] March 12, 2013 – My first postpartum period, and thus began the (LONG) cycle began that brought us Harvey. […]

Leave a Reply

Discover more from My Cheap Version of Therapy

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading