Yesterday was a bit of a scramble, but when the dust settled, my sister that lives in Ohio and I had both booked tickets to fly home for Grandma’s funeral on Monday. I’ll be flying with Harvey (flights #1-#4, coming right up!), but I decided to leave Stella here in Colorado with her Dad for Father’s Day (and save us the cost of a 2nd airline seat). I am SO happy that all 5 of us siblings will be together in MN this weekend, just to be there for our grandfather and Mom more than anyone else.
At any rate, last night Charlie and I were talking logistics for taking care of Stella while I was gone, and I realized that I have never been away from Stella for more than 2 nights. I’ve only done that once, and it was when I was about 8w pregnant with Harvey and absolutely wiped out, and it’s actually the weekend I ended up weaning Stella cold turkey while she stayed with her grandparents 15 minutes away from us. For this trip I’ll be gone 3 nights and I’ll be out of the state. It’s a little bittersweet to realize that Stella is getting old enough that it didn’t even cross my mind to worry about leaving her for a few nights. That being said, I’m a little freaked out about how much I’ll miss her. Obviously I know she’ll be well taken care of with her Dad, though I’m a little curious how he’ll handle 24/7 toddler care on his own. This will probably be a good experience for all of us… 😉
And finally, I leave you with a poem. One of my Mom’s best friends sent her this, and it’s pretty amazing, especially to anyone who has ever lost their Mom to Alzheimer’s long before the physical death happened.
Two Mothers Remembered
by Joann Snow Duncanson
I had two Mothers – two Mothers I claim
Two different people, yet with the same name.
Two separate women, diverse by design,
But I loved them both because they were mine.
The first was the Mother who carried me here,
Gave birth and nurtured and launched my career.
She was the one whose features I bear,
Complete with the facial expressions I wear.
She gave me her love, which follows me yet,
Along with the examples in life that she set.
As I got older, she somehow younger grew,
And we’d laugh as just Mothers and daughters should do.
But then came the time that her mind clouded so,
And I sensed that the Mother I knew would soon go.
So quickly she changed and turned into the other,
A stranger who dressed in the clothes of my Mother.
Oh, she looked the same, at least at arm’s length,
But now she was the child and I was her strength.
We’d come full circle, we women three,
My Mother the first, the second and me.
And if my own children should come to a day,
When a new Mother comes and the old goes away.
I’d ask of them nothing that I didn’t do.
Love both of your Mothers as both have loved you.
Good luck and I love that poem. My grandma has Altimeters as well and it is so devastating.
Good luck with your trip. I’m sure it’ll be nice to be with all of your siblings, but I completely understand you missing Stella! Love that poem, beautiful.
I’m so sorry for the loss of your grandmother, Josey. Or perhaps, as the poem indicates, both of your grandmothers. As you can imagine, the poem made me cry. It’s beautiful and heartbreaking. I’m glad that all of your siblings will be there for your mom. You’re sure to be her strength.
Was thinking of you when I read this 😔 xx hugs Josey for you and your family xxxx
You should have Charlie guest post about his first solo time with a toddler 🙂 or at least semi- interview him and tell us what he says!
My dad lost his dad to Alzheimer’s, and he told me once in his final days that he felt like he already lost him years ago. I had never thought about anything like that before. I’d like to send him this poem, but he has 11 siblings and his mother mostly cared for his father toward the end; so I’m not sure how much of it he would relate to.
I’m so sorry again for everything you’ve been through lately. I hope being with so much of your family will give you some peace, even if only temporarily.
Safe travels! So sorry for your loss.
That poem gave me chills. My grandma had Alzheimers and we lost her long before she passed. It’s so hard. It makes no sense. 😞
I’m glad you’re able to be with your family at this time. Being together is so important… Your family is so GOOD at being there for one another.
I’m so sad for you, and thinking of you. Hugs!
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