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Time in Purgatory…aka…Shopping

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I have never been a girl who loves to shop, and shopping online is a huge no no in my life. Always. Nothing I order online ever looks good on me. Ever. I can try on 80 pairs of jeans to find one pair I kind of like. People who order clothing online creep me out…and by that, I mean they make me kind of jealous in a weirded out sort of way. Even when I was a Size 6 teenager, I was not into shopping, and as I have grown older & wiser…and unfortunately, wider, this has just gotten worse.

Shopping for me is an adventure, but not really a fun one. It’s more of the following variety.

How long will it take me to find…
…tops that flatter my bust…but don’t make me look like a hooker or a prude?
…jeans that show off my long legs…but not my muffin top?
…dresses that can be dressed up or down…but not for the cost of my first born child (O hell no!).

As of today, my life has changed.

That’s right. In honor of my upcoming trip to Norway to visit my little sis (yippee!!) I decided it was time to break down and buy some clothes. Please keep in mind I live in the middle of nowhere (people seriously CAMPED OUTSIDE THE STORE when they put in a Target 30 miles down the road a couple years ago), so my choices are quite limited! I tend to buy clothing once/twice a year. Max. And I kind of like it that way.

My mother in law gave me a gift card to the local JCPenny’s for my birthday back in January, and it’s been forgotten & neglected burning a hole in my wallet ever since. My old roommate was also a huge Vickie’s fan, and it’s thanks to her that I ever knew they made more than cute bras & panties. Seriously.

I decided to check out Vickie’s online first. Of course there are TONS of cute clothes, but as usual, I’m certain they will all look awful on me, b/c this has happened OFTEN in the past. However, they had a great sale going on, so I bit the bullet & ordered a few things. My goal was to have everything *mix-n-matchy and easily packed into a tiny space (I’m taking one carry on piece of luggage for 12 days in Norway!). While I waited for those things to be delivered, I stopped into JCPenny’s (they honestly have a kick ass one about 30 minutes from here that has great selection & everything is always on sale) and picked out two dresses, a tshirt, and an across-the-body purse to carry my **essentials in while I’m in Norway.

When I got home, I was afraid to try on anything. Anything. I decided to wait until the Vickie’s order showed up b/c thanks to Grumble’s post, I had decided to order those creepy tight let’s show off every bulge things called leggings to layer things with. Yep, I did it. I ordered leggings. I have not worn leggings since the 80s. When it was cool. And I was really not that cool.

At any rate, I figured they’d be easy to pack and layer for different looks…plus it’s Norway. In May. Which could mean 40s or 60s, and a girl’s gotta be prepared to layer for warmth!

Today at lunch I picked up my package from Vickie’s, and some crazy part of me decided to run home and try on everything right away.

Lo and behold, ARE YOU FREAKIN’ KIDDING ME? I LOVED IT ALL!

I loved this
and these…(leggings in both black & cobblestone)
I loved this wrap…
and these… (shirt in both black & cosmo pink)
and even this… (even though it’s blue!)

I loved every item in my Vickie’s order. On ME.
As a disclaimer, I do not look like the ladies above. Not one stinkin’ bit. HFS.

I couldn’t find examples of the dresses I got from JCP, but OMG, I loved everything and was mix-n-matchin’  and layering to my heart’s content over my lunch hour. It. Was. Awesome.

Did I mention I ordered everything in a Medium? Even the leggings? And it all FIT?
That is HUGE for me… well, small for me. That means I’m getting back to my happy place!

*Pink. Black. Orange. You know, the only colors that should exist in clothing anyway!
**Passport. Camera. Credit card. Sunglasses. Chapstick. Provera to start my next cycle. Not necessarily in that order.

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