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To Sleep or Not To Sleep

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Miss Mac just wrote a great post about how they have five different types of beds for their little boy and had grand plans for his sleep habits, and yet every night he ends up sleeping in her arms, warm and snugly, for hours at a time, on and off the boob buffet.
I can so relate. 🙂
The plan was to have Stella sleep, tightly swaddled, in the Arm’s Reach co-sleeper. That way she wasn’t actually in bed with us, but she was bundled up safe and close for the middle of the night feedings. Great plan, right? 
I took this picture during a nap that Miss Stella took this past week, but it is definitely not the norm.
This. This is the norm.

During the day, she’ll doze in the swing. She’ll doze in the boppy. She’ll doze in my bed. She’ll doze on Daddy’s chest. She’ll doze on Mommy’s chest. She’ll doze in the moby. She’ll doze in my lap. She probably dozes everywhere they tell you not to let your child sleep.

…and you know what? I don’t think it makes me a bad Mom.

I DON’T co-sleep while drunk and I’m not a super deep sleeper. I 100% trust that I’m not going to roll out of bed in the middle of the night, and I also don’t believe that I could roll over on my daughter. If I was worried about it at all, I wouldn’t co-sleep.
I DON’T leave her unattended near loose blankets or pillows that she could slide down and suffocate in.

I DO sleep more (as do my husband and daughter) thanks to co-sleeping.
I DO get more time to cuddle with my daughter.
I DO love the quality time together.
I DO nurse on demand, and I’m sure that contributes to my sleeping preferences.
I DO think that everyone is different, and this is what works for us.

I’m reading The Happiest Baby on the Block, and so far I really like it. He really stresses how these first few months YOU CANNOT SPOIL A BABY by holding her too much or by picking her up when she cries. She’s used to being held and fed 24/7 in your womb, so this world is a huge adjustment to say the least. Even if you’re holding her 12 hours a day right now, that feels like a 50% reduction to her – not like spoiling!

I don’t know how to express it better than by saying that this feels right to me.

It feels right to pick her up when she cries.
It feels right to nurse her when she’s hungry instead of trying to get her on a schedule already.
It feels right to cuddle as much as possible while I can!

I’m not against a routine per se…I just don’t think it’s critical to follow one very strictly these first few months when she is so tiny and needs to eat and sleep so often.

We are starting to do more of a bed time routine. Around 8pm, I change her, swaddle her up tight in her halo sleepsack (she really does sleep better tightly swaddled right now), and nurse her. Then I put her down drowsy in the co-sleeper, and we cross our fingers and pray that she’ll at least sleep the first 3-4 hr stretch in there.

When she does, it’s nice! I’m not gonna lie… 🙂
Charlie and I get to cuddle and watch some TV and sleep a couple of hours.

When she doesn’t, that’s okay too!
I pull her into bed, snuggle her up close, and shhhh her until she goes to sleep (or give her the boob until she falls asleep).

I’m sure our sleep routine will change greatly as she grows.
I’m sure that routines will become more important to follow, and she’ll be able to go longer between feedings which will help everything.
I’m sure I’ll rejoice the first time I sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time (much less through the night).
I’m sure I’ll want more cuddly alone time with my husband, and some day that will prompt us to move her to the crib in the next room.

But in the meantime, I’m going to enjoy every minute of my cuddle time with my baby, and that’s okay.

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